Dave Barry’s Money Secrets
Dave Barry’s Money Secrets: Like: Why Is There a Giant Eyeball on the Dollar?
Author:
Dave Barry
Publisher:
Brilliance Audio
Date of Publication:
2006
ISBN:
1597371653
Rating:
7
Summary:
Dave Barry tackles many of the most common financial questions people have… using humor, sarcasm, and satire. The topics he addresses range from: investing in the stock market to buying a home to how to perform well as a CEO. The real irony, of course, is that despite his humorous treatment of all of these topics, the book basically does reflect a pretty accurate understanding of many of these financial issues: (1) the average layperson is very likely to get screwed financially over the course of their life, (2) wealthy people will remain wealthy but probably become even more wealthy, and (3) poor people may as well give up hope now.
Review:
I’m a regular reader of Dave Barry’s columns and have always found his writing witty and entertaining. Barry has a keen ability to paint normal human behavior with the brush of humor. Barry’s style of humor is well-suited for this topic, even if the book isn’t uproariously hilarious throughout (it’s pretty funny, but not consistently funny).
As I mentioned above, the real irony in this book is that, despite blatantly poking fun of these topics, Barry is often right about them. For instance, Barry explains that paper money only has value because we all agree to behave as though it has value – which he considers to be laugh-out-loud hilarious in and of itself (and, in a sense, it is). He is, of course, right – that is the only reason paper money and electronic currency have value. His explanation of the economy (that no one really understands how it works – especially economists) is also pretty accurate. Barry takes on popular “financial gurus,” like Suze Orman, as well. I loved his satirical treatment of her books, which he ultimately points out is how Suze Orman makes her money – by selling people books, not by doing what she tells them to do (why else would she be writing these books?). Barry skewers CEOs as bumbling morons (literally, he uses the word “moron” dozens of times). He talks about how office furniture must give off “moron-rays” as there is no other explanation for how: (1) CEOs make such stupid decisions; (2) corporate boards decide to keep these CEOs despite their stupid decisions; and (3) CEOs make so much money. According to Barry, the only explanation is moron-ray emitting office furniture. Barry also skewers stockbrokers, who only give one piece of advice, ever, “Buy stocks” (because they’re stockbrokers, of course!) and stock analysts who basically have no idea why stocks go up or down and are about as good at predicting stock price changes as psychics are at actually reading your mind. Barry’s thoughts on the stock market: You’re better off betting your money at a casino than on the stock market. At a casino you know your odds; in the stock market you have no idea if there are even odds and even less of an idea what might happen to your money.
I think my favorite chapter – probably because it is currently relevant to one of my major preoccupations at the moment – is Barry’s advice on buying a house, “Don’t buy an old house, it will fall apart. Don’t buy a new house, it will fall apart.” In short, don’t buy a house – or, at least, don’t expect any house you buy to actually make you money. Barry details all the many ways he has lost money on both old and new homes, illustrating that it really doesn’t matter what you buy, homes are expensive to own.
Overall, for a good laugh at the rather ridiculous sphere of life we call “money management,” this book is worth picking up. As with most of Dave Barry’s humor you have to know what he is talking about in order to get the humor. As a result, the book won’t really teach anyone anything, but it is mildly entertaining.
(Note: I listened to this book as an mp3 on my iPod.)
