Part of the reason men get so jealous in relationships is because they don’t want to be cuckolded into raising someone else’s child.  Women are much less concerned about this as the maternity of children is readily discernible; the paternity, of course, is much less discernible.  While I’ve never truly questioned Toren’s paternity, it’s become increasingly obvious who his dad is because the kid is just like me.  He has sweaty feet (yep, I have sweaty feet), he has the same two crooked teeth I have, he likes adventure and traveling, he tries to lick people (I’ve learned that’s not something you do in polite company… most of the time), etc.  There are a number of other things he does that are similar to things I do, but I caught this behavior one day and was surprised.  Toren wraps his legs around the legs of his chairs:

I’m sure other people must do this, but I’ve never really seen anyone do it.  I, however, do it all the time when I’m sitting in chairs in which it is possible.  Weird!  Does anyone else do this?

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5 Replies to “Toren is my son”

  1. Ah, but what of cognitive dissonance pushing you to look for and interpret his behaviors as signs of paternity after all the work and emotion you have put into Toren? My son licks people, mainly my wife and I as we are primarily who he is around. As for sweaty feet, when do his feet get sweaty? When he has socks and semi-water repellent shoes on? Almost any kid will be in the same category (their overall temperature regulation systems are still learning to work properly). As for the chair, there are many explanations for that, particularly amongst children who are exploratory and will try to find something to occupy their limbs when sitting down. Modeling is also powerful.
    (Jokingly) You’ll have to have more proof than that for us to buy your story. You can pick up a DNA test at your local pharmacy and send it off to Sorenson Genomics, based out of Utah. For ~$160 they’ll be happy to give you the scientific results.

  2. Absolutely there is a cognitive bias. But the sweaty feet are a big give away. His feet are almost always sweaty, as are mine. Even when he is barefoot.

    Are you suggesting I should be worried about Toren’s paternity? 😉

  3. Ezra makes a good point. You live in Florida for crying out loud. I lost 29 pounds in 3 days because every part of my body was sweaty. Sweaty feet does not in any way determine paternity.

    Maybe you should invest that $160…

    On the other hand, considering that Toren looks exactly like a Cragun… and shockingly similar to both Ethan and Addyson, maybe you’re in the clear. Or… more apropos, Debi is in the clear 🙂

  4. I wrap my feet around chair legs like that too…and did even more so when my feet couldn’t quite reach the ground. As a side-note, I’ll catch myself noticing quirky things of Noah’s that are like Mark or I, and wonder if he picked up on that from seeing us do it or if it is genetic…and then I remember that he’s adopted. So, I guess in those cases it’s either the former…or a coincidence 😉

  5. The similarities that I see in our children and that I also have just make me love them all the more if they are things about myself that I like or don’t care one way or the other about. I find that a wonderful thing; but, just let them do something I don’t like about myself and that is another story. I either deny that I also do it or I try so hard to get them not to do it. I pout and am very stubborn– just let that peek out in one of my children and I cringe!!!! 🙁
    The video of Toren with the mask was so sad. He looked like Ethan- He has to have one on occasion also. Thank goodness for modern medicine. If you need it you need it.

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